What Am I Doing Today?

++ An Inner Monologue ++

What am I doing today?

I'm going to feel nauseous. 

I'm going to catalogue new recipes in my inbox. 

I'm going to buy my father and my future father-in-law Christmas gifts on Amazon. 

I'm going to go to Trader Joe's and buy bay leaves, salt, pepper, lemon poppyseed muffins, canned tomatoes, garlic cloves, parmesan cheese, naval oranges, spinach, gummy bears, and frozen pizza. 

I'm going to take a taxi home, and my driver's going to get lost. I'm going to tell him to turn off the meter. I'm going to feel even more nauseous. I'm going to judge this driver, and then feel bad about it. 

I'm going to put my groceries away, lie down on my bed, and will myself to stop feeling nauseous slash pregnant slash I'm going to have a slight freakout and wonder, "Am I pregnant?" No, I'm not. It's fine. 

I'm going to heat up one of the frozen pizzas I just bought, and I'm going to eat it. 

I'm going to do Jordan's laundry, because he always does mine, and it would be nice to return the favor. 

I'm going to watch Viola Davis be sassy on "How to Get Away with Murder," and I'm going to think about how the actress who played Paris on "Gilmore Girls" is now on this show, and though she's thinner now, she somehow looks worse. Maybe it's her platinum blonde hair. Not the best color for her pretty face, her cheekbones. She should go back to dirty blonde, light brown. 

I'm going to exercise in my apartment and possibly take the dog for a run if I can stop feeling nauseous. 

I'm going to send a number of text messages to a number of different people who wouldn't recognize my phone number if it weren't saved in their phones and vice versa.

I'm going to wish I was better at memorizing phone numbers. 

I'm going to shower, but not wash my hair or shave my legs. Shocker. 

I'm going to sing all sorts of songs all over my apartment. 

I'm going to love my dog and my cat. 

I'm going to send emails with Jordan. We send emails together. Wedding emails in particular. 

I'm going to have a drink with Jordan on our roof if it's not too cold. Otherwise, we'll have a drink while we watch TV. Some beer of some kind for him. Vodka soda for me. Or Coke Zero. Or maybe nothing. 

I'm going to hug Jordan multiple times and feel lucky that we're together, and well, just love him the way I always do and he'll do the same. 

I'm going to order a lot of Turkish food and eat a lot of it. A lot of pita bread specifically, but only if it's warm. I'm going to let Jordan have most of the hummus, because I'm cool like that and because his stomach is bigger than mine, and because I want the grape leaves, so there. 

I'm going to surf Netflix with Jordan for too long, because we can't agree on a movie or TV show to watch. Maybe we'll watch something scary. We like scary movies, but suspense-scary, not horror-zombie-scary. I kind of hate zombies. Actually, I just hate them. 

I'm going to brush my teeth with the electric toothbrush my mom got me. I'm going to remember that I need to pick up my new mouth guard at the dentist on Tuesday. Ew mouth guards. 

I'm going to go on social media a few times, and get interested, and then get bored. 

I'm going to fall asleep a lot earlier than I'd like to admit. 

I'm going to dream about things I'm going to forget. 

I'm going to wake up a few times in the middle of the night, and then I'm going to finally wake up on a new morning of a new day, and think What am I doing today? and it will start all over again.